But I feel like I need to write something. But I don't even know where to start. I am full to the bursting. I don' think my heart can take much more of this. It's all too much.

Why isn't there a song written for that feeling? You know, the one you get when there is no one to break your heart, and yet you feel like you are decaying under the weight of it all?

I am crumbling. I hate it here, but I am completely and utterly trapped by debt and fear.I am terrified. Oh, God please, I need You.

And you know what the worst part is? Talking about it doesn't help. But neither does bottling up.

I tried to save my time in a bottle, every moment.

I just don't know.

Why don't they allow you to private your journals on this thing? It's really irritating. Whatever, I supposed that if I cared enough I could always write all this somewhere else. And yet, there is something remarkably comforting about the fact that somewhere out there a stranger is reading this. They'll know how I feel, but I don't have to worry about them over-analyzing or trying to solve my problems. Whatev.

On second thought, I doubt that this is the reason they give you a journal on here. Maybe it's more like a blogspace. Ah! I am so tired!

Let go. I don't know. I really, more than anything else, just want to leave and go somewhere new.